If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
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