dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I FOUND THE LEGS
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize