He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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