batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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