Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Just puked most of my soul out..
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