Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
We talked him into tasing himself.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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