Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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