Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
ttyl tear gas
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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