so that wasnt chicken after all
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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