I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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