Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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