is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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