she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Alive.
So much puke
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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