I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
