AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
don't judge my taste in strippers
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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