He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
