Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
