Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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