Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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