Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize