And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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