You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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