Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
