You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize