you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
