how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
This is the high leading the old right now
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
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