so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
