Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...