Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
