come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
