We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
