u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
