So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
These 21 People Came Up With Hilarious Excuses For Their Hickies
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"