I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
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I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
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Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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