I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
