that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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