Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
smell my finger.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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