even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
