Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
