Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
