There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
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I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
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They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.