so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
