i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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