put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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