I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
and she was petting her beer can
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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