it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
