Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
