I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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