Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
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