the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize